me simplified.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

new.

and so a few minutes back i opened dad's wallet to get his i/c to print.
and i found those little neoprints that we siblings took while we're young.
the sides did not stick too much.
and he got them glued.
cause the sides are stained with dry yellow glue.
and that's his emilio valentino wallet he got as a gift from 2 years back.
i'm touched.
very touched.
indeed.
dad,i'm sorry for all this while.
i'm selfish.
indeed.

rainbow rush(:

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

because you're special.

When you were here before
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
You're so fucking special

But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here

I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice when I'm not around
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special

every night till 3.

rainbow rush(:

habits.

after much tossing and turning and spent last night sleepless,accompanied by mister pony.i somehow realize i got habits.haha.so.this is very random.well.maybe because there's nothing to blog about today.and cause today has been uber normal/mundane/bore/slow/tiring.

these habits i shall/may try to take away.but its just too bad if it stays =|
;i can't probably sleep w/o my bolster. (oh!so i fig why i can't sleep.)
;i do my own breakfast/lunch/dinner and don't do the same with the other fam members
;i laugh easily at stupit jokes. (this one.maybe im just stupit.)
;i go anywhere with my 'stuck-up-face',but im a softee at heart. (i swear!)
;i now realize im sloww.damn slow. (quite.somehow.)
;i realize half the jokes i tell ended up with only me myself laughing. (come on guys.this is funny!)
;i crave for random stuffs at the wrong timing.
;i'm always irritated easily on hot weather days. (see.blame it on the weather.)
;i'm paranoid.very.
;i'm impatient.most of the time.
;i'm bad at expressing myself. (uhhh....)
;i'm quite a hypocrite. (did i mean 'that' hypocrite?!)
;i'm squirmish when people started to stare.
;i smile.always. (this one habit uh?!)
;i treat me siblings worst than my friends. (i thought they have not much feeling.ohwell.)
;i usually mean what i say. (but if i got that weird expression on,than i don't.)
;i have split personality.
done.

guess that's about it.
goodnight all.
we shall/may/will meet again.
(eh.sounds familiar.i wonder....)

oh where oh where can my pony be :)

rainbow rush(:

Saturday, April 26, 2008

i fix all i've done if i could start again.

Morning time runs rather slow today.And im late to Hid's.So get a cab there.hoho.thanks to brother for the twenty.was starving as didn't get any dinner yesterday,only small sweet oranges.so grabbed this quaker oat stuffs dad bought last night and off to fly to hids.almost fell asleep in the slow moving cab; thanks uncle thanks.after much what-to-wear-i-don't-like-this-pant-i-look-like-ameeyna-lar,went off and took 80 to bugis.

Anyway.blame it on the hot-hot-heated weather.and got lost trying to find eating place.so met Arfake at bugis junction and off to banquet raffles place..

As the gig was postponed and dragged late,we decide to walk ard haji lane and talk craps.go gaga over vintage bags that cost bombs.and many many malaysian student having a tour there.ver kecoh!

Eh.i dun feel like bloggin now.

But gay partner makes my day.FULL OF CRAPS.PURE CRAPS!kenot tahan laughing at her ass-har-face jokes!shall do it again.only at a better weather.And shall teach me hardcore dance.Just maybe not like the way you do it.fugly.instead of hitting others,you'll hit yourself like that.
so.
thanks for food.
thanks for everything.
and i just realize gayboy took my mp3 cable.for a long time now.damn.

so deep.so deep.so deep.

rainbow rush(:

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

can cut my wrist now.

im a fool that falls into a trap wide open.so wide the trap that i just let myself fall.hope its not deep.but its the beginning.i got scared.very scared.i need help.fuck.can i cut my wrist now.

i love my pony.i don't want to change that.ever.

rainbow rush(:

worst days.

damn bored.
damn tired.
damn sleepy.

credits to;
father.
no dinner for 4 days.
and still counting.

on the bright side;
thanks to gay partner for moshing.
thanks to RA/Shyla.
thanks Afiq.
thank you for the weekend.
was AWWESOMME.

wasn't that bad after all :)

rainbow rush(:

Thursday, April 17, 2008

love is an easy word

rainbow rush(:

thanks.

Went off to KK damn early as gran's op will be around 11.So,got dragged out of bed by mum at 730.Was so beat!I forgot if i even bathe that morning.Haha!Well,i did.The whole of yesterday was spent at the hospital as gran's op was over the 3 hours that docter said so.Had a little exploration around the hospital with mum to kill time.And i got in this bookstore which sell stuffs about bodyparts and all.It was SO COOL!Spent about an hour looking through the stuffs there.They even sell specimen skulls,body charts,bone keychains,cute medical charm bracelet and small mini books!haha!I'm so gonna get the 'Mini book;Dreams For Dummies'.So,gran finally got wheeled in to the ward around 630.And i guess she's in a pretty bad shape.Yes.I'll pray for you.Get well soon Gran.You're strong okayy:)

Was damn beat from yesterday,so i got up nar 10 this morning,and realise i was gonna be late for work.And brother slept himself easy even though he starting work at 1030.farktart.Thank god i wasn't late for work.And Annie gave me a lung's fright when i open the shutter!damn her!Sitting there with her hair all over her head.ASS-HOLE!I freaked out like shit and spat a loud "FUCK!" in her face.HAHA!ohh.no hard feelings lah this ramen ten crews.she just laugh her ass-off.She told Melvin about it later,and he teased me like shit about it.Okayy.Paiseyy laa!I'll make sure she won't do that again tomorrow.I'm doing opening again.And i'll make sure Melvin don't play his laser light on me again.Mungens.

The weather is blardy hot today.Just beacuse its going to rain in the afternoon.Damn.
Ponyponypony; :D wake up was sweet.

cowbells<3

rainbow rush(:

Thursday, April 10, 2008

fcuk lar.

im having major pms.umm.even thought the red light hasn't blinked yet.ughhh!i dun feel like working anymore,except when noor is around.hoho.

well,it kinda sucks when you get to know someone and being all sincerely friendly,getting him/her used to the damn new environment around him/her and got back shits when he'she took over the place.to me it sucks big time.like fuck.

im blardy lethargic.from the past two days.i need my new spectacles from mum very soon.just that she's being,"Ahh.no money.you've got your pay right.use it to pay for your specs then." again.like fuck.blardy.i have to pay those phone bills that brother used for about 100 bucks and top-up for sister's prepaid and pay for my concessions.mother.its only 200+ this month.don't make me swear to you in the face.you're really gonna make me.

and thanks to the damn solid ice freezer.whoever did not carry-out the normal weekly routine to clean the ice-cream freezer,it gave me 8 slits all over my right hand.blardy.now its all prickly and swollen.i swear the next time i'll just ignore the routine,well,as if anyone notice.

on a very lighter note apart from all this rantings and swearing that i find kind of entertaining.its thursday!!i can't wait for tomorrow!
ponyponypony;come back.umm.alar.just comeback lar.
and brother agrees to catch 'class A affair' with me at esplanade!!!!!!!!!!hohoho. +D

thank you and goodnight

rainbow rush(:

Friday, April 04, 2008

compose me/it.

thanks to the weather,it was burning hot.so doing groceries with mum got quite a chore as i tend to get 'angry-angry-pissed' when the weather affects.grrr.okayy.i dunnoe what to blogg about.hmm.

overall,its been a normal normal day.and i need to fill the artsy side on me,im bored to the core.so might as well do some drawings laterr.

ponyponypony;okayy.10 days!omg!peee-nut!!

i trust you with all my heart and brain.cells.

rainbow rush(:

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

somewhere.somehow.

tired to shits for these past few days and work was rough yesterday.my shift was suppose to end by 930,but i had it dragged till closing as there weren't enough front crew.anyway,the last customer left at about 1020,ten minutes before closing.damn,we're pissed.on a lighter note,far east's supervisor came over to work permanently at amk.he's melvin and super nicee.yupyup.i enjoyed working with him.tee-hee.and i think my foot got kind of swollen.urggh!

i have to haul myself up from bed thanks to mum's morning call.grrr!got up quite late,so breakfast was only a glass of hot choc.followed mum and granny to kk hospital for gran's check-up.have to wait for about 15 minutes for them,so i kill time checking out the big charts of whatever-cancer-you-name-it that's pasted around the big waiting room.i was quite annoyed with the waiting chair,cause its those kind that's able to recline back and front if you're leaning on it,so it made this loud 'squeak!squeak!' noise if you lean on it abit.sadly,all the chair's are the same.and you'll hear the squeaky noise every now and then.irritating!

so,had dad fetch us and then fetch amirah from her religious class and off to early dinner.as for me was late lunch cum early dinner.famished!

got psyched as haizann called on my way back home.he's somewhere over at his camp place and i can barely hear him as it was so noisy.ohwell.hehehe.end the call with something that sounds like; lerh yuu oh hey.

errr.

kaki; thanks.i think you make a good sport.

if i could find you now things would get better.
we can leave this town.
and run forever.

rainbow rush(: